Get over yourself.

Just get the fuck over it already.Or at least stfu about it. I'm so very tired of hearing how poorly I measure up. I got the memo regarding my inadequacies as a human being a long time ago. There's a reason I left at 17, a reason I've not been back. You sucked as a parent. You like to pretend you raised us all on your own, but the truth of the matter is we raised ourselves. Had we not been the people we are, your little self indulgent experiment that passed for our childhood would have failed. For at least one of us, it did. So the next time you want to pat yourself on the back for all your successes, suck on that a bit before you do.

Sincerely,

She who will never be enough

You all suck SO bad

It's bad enough that you laid me off after returning from a weeklong vaca in Mexico. And actually had the balls to sit there and tell me that you'd changed your business plan, and couldn't afford my salary anymore.

Let's review -- how did you get to work that morning? Oh yes, in your Lexus SUV. Which parks next to your wife's Lexus sedan. In the garage of your ginormous mansion on the banks of the river. But I digress.

So today I go to your fucking website, to refresh my memory on how response cards are laid out and worded. And what do I find?

I find that all of the wording that I had painstakingly gone through and corrected, that wording written by your 20 year old protégé who couldn't punctuate a sentence properly to save her soul, has all been changed back to the way it was. And the font has been changed back to the fucking illegible stankass font she originally had it in, too.

Fine. Just fine. Fuck off and die. I tried and tried to improve the image of the company, by changing some of the marketing strategies, and updating the text on both websites to appear as though at least someone in your employ had a grasp on the English language. Forgive me for giving a flying fuck. I sincerely hope your entire business is circling the drain.

Holy shit, you're so much more of a douche than I thought.

I pity you.

It has to hurt to be that callous. I can't imagine what a foul, polluted place your mind must be. Nothing good ever escapes it. It must be stifling in there, what with all the hate and stupidity banging around, causing all that hot air you spew. There's a reason your children don't respect you. You don't deserve it. There's a reason you don't have any friends. You haven't earned them. There's a reason you will die a lonely death. You won't let anyone in.
I don't know why you felt the need to tell me you love me. We both know you don't. We both know the truth of the matter. There's no point in pretending. Your son stopped caring about anything a long time ago. That, above all else, will be your legacy. You gave him nothing as a mother. You didn't teach him how to love, how to care, how to experience the world with any sort of joy. You gave him to the world, a huddled mess of broken bits. It's amazing he's become the man he is in spite of you.
I'm done. I'm done pretending that it's all ok. I'm done playing nice when you don't deserve it. I'm fucking done with you and all your games. The next time you attend a funeral and decide to comment on the "box" the bereaved have chosen, or the appearance of the spouse of the deceased, I will knock your last tooth out and spit in your face. You are a cancer. Consider me your chemo.

Signed,
The Bitch Who's Sick of Your Shit

Hey, Dumbshit

What in the hell were you thinking? You not only posted your supposed best friend's name and location on a public board, but now you've taken the liberty to also post the names of her children and provide a link to recent picture.

Did you bother to ask her first? Did you let her know that you have so little value for her children's privacy and safety that you not only gave out their names and hometown, but also put pictures of them on the Internet? Did you let her know that, thanks to you, at least 2000 strangers have access to pictures of her children and can pass them around at will? Gee, maybe the kids will get lucky and someone will photoshop some sort of shitty saying on the pic and let it go viral. Woohoo, won't that just be a barrel of laughs for the little ones.

The entire world making fun of them, now who wouldn't want that?

You're such a good "Aunt".

To the ugliest crayon of them all

Your racism is showing again, you might want to tuck that back in. Keeping it cleverly disguised as just your annoying personality keeps the rest of us merely sickened by your presence rather than violently opposed to you drawing breath. So really, it's in your own best interest to keep the white sheets and antiquated opinions your dirty little secret. No one else is interested.

kthxbai

You Stupid Hag

How dare you. That young man adores you. He spent the entire weekend overjoyed at finally being able to spend time with you. Every chance he got, he sat next to you, talked to you, smiled at you, told you how much he loves you and how happy he was to see you again. And how did you repay him? You called him fat and made fun of him. Not that his brother fared any better, because according to you he's too thin and should also be mocked.

I have no idea what makes you think you are any sort of nutritional expert but I have news for you, you. are. clueless. You have spent your entire life trying to kill yourself by eating nothing but deep fried food and right now I'm sorry you didn't succeed. You have eaten and smoked your way into having a heart attack and chronic health problems, yet you have the nerve to insult a young man for wanting a salad with his meal. You should truly be ashamed of yourself. I know I certainly am.

If you ever again try to make either of my children feel bad about themselves I will not quietly correct you in order to refrain from making a scene in public the way I did today. No, if you are ever fortunate enough to even see those boys again and you make the choice to insult either one of them I will stand up and slap the wig off your fat little Cajun head, and it doesn't matter to me if I have to go through your husband to do it.

Firmly,
The Mother of your Grandchildren

Calling you a douche is an insult to douches everywhere

Well, you finally got your way. You've been gunning for me for a long time, in ways subtle and overt, and at long last you're triumphant.

You fucked up. You fuck up a lot, but are usually able to save your ass, or someone else saves it for you. This time you blamed it on me, and since nothing was in writing it came down to your word against mine.

You sat there and lied to my face (although it's possible that you actually believe your lies, which perhaps excuses you) and watched me get fired from my job that I've had for almost five years.

Then you got up, went into your office, and continued your self-absorbed, odd task of taking pictures of yourself every day. Yes, the Daily Photo is an important part of your routine, using your company laptop, often on company time. Who does that?

This is who:


I don't think your collection of crosses will save you in the long run.